so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
