Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
