similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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