Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize
