I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
