Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm getting married
To pizza
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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