i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
