Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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