I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
