I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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