You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
