the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
