I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
