You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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