Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.â€
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