he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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