He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
