We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize