I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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