I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Randomize
