Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize