Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you will always have a special place in my vag
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I have peed in a lot of sinks
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
