you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
