Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I wish you could order shots online.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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