Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
