So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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