sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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