i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
