dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
