Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
