he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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