remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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