I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
