Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
