Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
