Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Randomize
