highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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