I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Randomize
