That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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