I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
