You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i can't believe i had my finger in that
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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