we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
