who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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