yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
