please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
