i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
