I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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