never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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