mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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