It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
